Back to work

Well...

It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I'm not sure if it is denial...or the fact that I knew I had vacation for Thanksgiving and would be coming back part time...or the fact that I knew we'd have Christmas vacation in only a few weeks...but I actually ENJOYED being at work.

Don't tell Zoe.

I mean...if I had the option, there is NO way I'd even go back to work. BUT, since I HAVE to (like the use of the capital letters?!) I'm really in the best place. I'm fortunate to have a job. And I'm really fortunate to work in a place that is pretty flexible. That said, I haven't been stressed out in quite some time and have already begun to shred my cuticles.

Truthfully, I'm not worried at all about where Zoe will be during the day. We have it better than a lot of other people. We don't have to use daycare. Jod's parents are the best people in the world and the worst thing that Zoe will experience during the day is being held the entire time by her grandfather who positively ADORES her.

I'm worried that I won't care about the student issues that come up at the University. How can I really care about those when I could be at home experiencing my daughter laugh for the first time? Suddenly everything else is so unimportant.

But, I have the job with the benefits. And with an infant, well, we need those benefits. Health insurance, life insurance, etc. Those are really important.

Is it wrong that I'd almost rather see the laughing?